New versus old, how does this relate to relationships? My very intelligent son once said to me, “every relationship gets old mom”, just as every relationship is new at some point. Ah the feeling of a relationship that is in its early stages. The “honeymoon” stage as it is often called. Everything is exciting and fresh. The palms get sweaty, the heart beats a little faster, and the tummy is full of butterflies. It’s a wonderful time and a wonderful feeling. I don’t know when it starts to happen, it can happen at different stages during the relationship, but you can be sure at some point it will happen. The newness starts to wear off. The quirky little habits that once enticed and charmed you now become irritating. For instance, my husband shaves his head in the shower. At first this was cute, his sudsy head and nothing else behind the frosted shower glass, now it’s like really, do you have to shave your head in the shower? This adds approximately 5 minutes on to your shower time, and 5 minutes on to the time I have to wait before getting in!!! He also has a problem multi-tasking. When we were first married, I realized that he couldn’t make the bed and talk to me at the same time. Back then I’d throw a pillow at him and giggle about it, now I find it extremely annoying. Really Bob, you are the most talented, and intelligent man I know, and you can’t answer a question and make the bed at the same time?? When did these feelings change? When did this start to bother me? Why were all these idiosyncrasies so adorable when we first met, and now they grate down my spine like nails on a chalk board? Well he didn’t change that’s for sure, did I? Was I so in love I was able to look past all of this? Well now I think I’ve hit on something. Am I less in love with him now then I was then? No, of course I’m not! I’m just comfortable. Our relationship is not that slinky, silk, bathrobe any more. Now it’s that old, worn fleece robe. As I think of this comparison I begin to realize something else. Yes the slinky, silk robe is beautiful and exciting and feels amazing, but the fleece robe is warm, welcoming and comfortable. If I had the choice, sure, I’d wear the silk robe for an hour or two, but the fleece robe is what I would ultimately want wrapped around my body. I remember when my dad passed away. It was unexpected, he fell backwards down some stairs and hit his head. I was an hour from home, and my husband rushed to the scene. When I arrived home and he enfolded me in his arms, there was such an incredible feeling of relief. No one could have comforted me the way he did. In his arms I felt like I could breathe again. He was my fleece bathrobe. So as I examine relationships, my friends, my children’s, my siblings, my own, I try to put things into perspective. The years go by, brown hair turns to grey, children come along, children grow up and move away, parents pass on; nothing is constant. So remember…… in time the silk robe will begin to fall from your shoulders, it will shift and slide and will not cover all the places that need covering, but the fleece robe will remain inviting, it will not disappoint. The fleece robe will envelope you, hug you, and comfort you, it will become “home”. It will ease your worries, warm your heart, and always cover all the right places.